What do Military Wives do to deserve to get paid?

What do Military Wives do to deserve to get paid? If you are honestly married to your husband because you love him, and you are honestly a good, faithful wife, then you shouldn't need to get paid for the honor of being the number one supporter of your soldier. There is a spouse that started a facebook group about this, and people expecting to get paid just for being married is one of those things that gets me steamed.

Yes, the Military Wife life is hard, but what about the Firefighters wife? Cops Wife? EMT's wife? Boarder Patrol’s wife? Ok, their husbands are coming home after their shift to possibly help with kids and the regular household junk like homework, housework, balancing the checkbook, and bills.. They don’t have to deal with everything for months at a time without their spouse being there, but they deal with sending their husband’s out to various degrees of danger every day. They don’t get R&R, and they don’t have all of the resources that are available to military spouses. (Check out Military One Source, MWR, Family Life Counselors, Strong Bonds marriage retreats, CYS childcare during deployments, and the good things that have come out of our local Army Family Action Plans.) Their husbands don’t get any extra pay for going out into life threatening situations every day. Members of the military get “deployment pay” and even though it doesn’t always get paid on time, service members get paid to go to schools (TDY) for their specific jobs (MOS), most of the time.

Yes, we have to deal with “Military Intelligence”, (which is even more oxymoronic than “Jumbo Shrimp” more often than not) but why should you get a hand out from your government just because you think you have it harder than if you and your hubby went to work for Corporate America? Hmmm? Do you think that dealing with your husband’s boss and co-workers is any easier in the civilian world? If your husband is a manager, he might not have to go bail his worker out of jail, but he would be the one responsible for either covering the shift, or the one in trouble for not getting the shift covered. And do you realize that in this economy it is almost impossible to “fire” a soldier (unless he/she does something REALLY stupid) until his contract runs out. Some soldiers are even retained (Stop Loss) because they are just too valuable to the military. What other job offers you that kind of security?

And what about school? There are so many programs, especially for enlisted families, to help with both spouses and dependants (children) of military members get college degrees and certificates, it is overwhelming! The Army even helps your soldier go to college on their dime, if you are willing to do the paperwork, and get decent grades… It is like an Army scholarship, but different.

There are so many FREE programs that are offered to the military families. If you want to get something other than the love and respect of your husband and family, and the respect and admiration of so many other Americans, go to your post/base MWR office or to http://www.militaryonesource.com/ and find out what programs are offered near you.

If you want to get paid but don’t want to work for someone else, start a business from your home. So many spouses on post here at Ft. Wainwright have Pampered Chef, Avon, jewelry, candle, or other home-based businesses with web-based ordering, that we really need a directory of all these. Hmmm… Someone could publish one of those, and sell ads to make money, or they could have a web page that would list all these businesses in one space, and have people pay to be listed. Or you could give up the privilege of being a stay at home mom, and go get a job! That’s what most people that want to get paid do!

I am not going to apologize for my opinion about trying to get paid for doing nothing, or for thinking you deserve something for being in a certain demographic. I have been in a position where I could have gotten a government handout for just being me in the situation I put myself.

There are times when assistance is appropriate. If you are really in need, you don’t have a family or a church family that can help you get back up, if you don’t qualify for the emergency loans that the military offers, but you are trying to get back up out of a pit, and just cannot do it… YES! That is when you should get some help. But as hard as marriage can be, especially a military marriage, it doesn’t deserve a government stipend. If you looked at your situation, and took advantage of the programs around you, you would see that you are not doing anything that generations of women have been doing without the benefit of a paycheck.

This is totally my opinion as the proud daughter of a 30+ year Active Duty and Reserve Navy Veteran, the proud wife of an Active Duty Army NCO, AND a proud Homeschooling, stay at home Mom of a teenager. ( BTW- I don't get paid for any of the above.)